Cubical Life…

With the Mr. studying around the clock for boards and me…ummmm avoiding doing homework/studying… besides getting my GCL on  I changed that up because I don’t tan…gym,cleaning,laundry… we haven’t done much of anything else that would make for interesting blog posts.  Hmph.  Then I started noticing all the randomness that goes on at my job on a daily basis and I thought hey that’s something.

 So here it goes… a peek into my 8-4:30…

 Parking: yes, I am literally going to start at our parking garage.  Our parking garage was one of the VERY first garages built-in the city of Milwaukee like WAY BACK THEN.  To point out that fact is not really necessary, because you can tell.  Apparently WAY BACK THEN Milwaukee peeps drove tiny little like motorcycle sized vehicles because our ramp is only big enough for one car to pass through at once.  And…. We only have one ramp.  Yes, that is correct, the cars going up have to hope that the maniac drivers who park in the garage are not coming down the ramp at the same time, because I will always be the driver who gives in and reverses down the ramp to the street. 

I kind of feel like a serious secret Jason Borne type of person daily as I hit the ramp at high speeds to make it to a spot before someone starts down … and if I don’t make it then I am just a serious bad…. Driving in reverse down the ramp and swinging into the street.  I’m just saying, I think I should only drive in reverse.Then onto my desk….

 I am not sure if any of you have ever experienced life in a cubical before but it is WEIRD.  My office job before this one I had an office… and I was an intern… other than that, the classroom has always been my “office.”  Anyways, the desk/filing situation is ok, but the privacy is non-existent.  A few things I have noticed:

–          Every SINGLE person looks into your cubical and at your computer screen each time they walk by

 –          If you make eye contact with someone they will stop and have a long conversation … this is especially important to avoid if you have already been through the weather (yes. WI is CRAZY, got it  Lake Effect CHECK), the Packers (don’t really watch NFL…but sure Go Pack!), the Brewers, (sorry, not my favorite kind of tailgating, y’all do not even know) and of course, the Badgers (I mean really, do you not see all the LSU gear up in my desk?!)

 Avoid eye contact! This one took me a while to learn because I was determined my new BFF’s would work here…

 –          Because there is no door, people will just walk in and stand behind you until you notice, causing you to have multiple heart attacks daily… one of my co-worker’s positions a picture like a rearview mirror so that she can see when people are approaching! HA!

 –          Since we are all working in essentially the same area, the office is FREEZING.  So I have a mini-heater on… every day… if only I could get tan from this thing… brilliant idea..hmmmm

 –          Ummm, again… working in the same space…. All day you hear EVERY cough, sneeze, burp (yup)(gag) attempted loogie hacking (GAG) and only once something from the other side if you know what I mean…

 –          Oh and food… people eat warmed up food at their desk, like warmed up fish omgosh gross  or the worst is brats and sour kraut! I die.  Memos!

Office memos are the best, I remember at the casino we would get memos about press dates, lunch meetings, quarter backs being kicked out of the casino … (hmmm) and all sorts of other non bathroom related issues.  Here… the ladies room is the main subject. Here are just a few examples:

–          Please do not flush paper cups down the toilet.

  • No I am not joking, this is for real.

–          Please do not flush wads of paper towels down the toilet.

  • Again, real.

–          Please do not flush pens, hair clips etc… other than toilet made products down the toilet.

  • Okay, the pens was true, but once I saw a clip in the toilet, I mean HOW does that happen?!

–          Please do not leave your dishes in the bathroom to soak.

  • Who does this?! We have a kitchen and OMGOSH gag, why are you bringing your dishes into the bathroom?@?@#$@#$

Finally, a non bathroom memo.

 Please do not scream if a roach runs by you, our office is over the river, we have bugs.

1)      I do not scream intentionally, yet, if a roach or any other form of water bug runs, hops, scurries, dies anything else near me I WILL SCREAM. 

2)      You can’t tell people not to react when a giant bug is on them.

 My memo: Please do not panic when the bear is chasing you, you chose to be outside, there are bears.

 Okay! Well, as far as offices goes, I believe I have adequately described Dunder Mifflin’s sister-company… otherwise known as my place of work.

 PS: I totally appreciate The Office way more now… also, did you know they have a legit website?! http://www.dundermifflin.com/index.shtml

You are welcome.

 PPS: they blocked Pinterest from my computer! True story, yes, I am crushed.

 I am grateful for the paycheck and insurance my company offers… it makes our lifestyle oh so much better. I can’t give up Pizzeria Piccola… dinner? I hope the MR. reads this…mmmm pizza it has been forever!

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Comments

  1. This post made me laugh out loud! Glad to see things haven’t changed too much around there! Glad you’re hanging in there. Miss you!

  2. My husband is staring at me as I am also laughing outloud reliving the memos

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